I took a trip to visit my oldest friend’s new home in Lahndahn Town. The train journey is just a smidge too long. I quite enjoy the first couple of hours. Two hours of peace with a book, music and the option to go for a wee on my own is rare treat as a mum of three. As it tips into hour three I get fidgety. The velour of the train seat is making my arse itch, and there is no dignified way to scratch oneself in public. I have eaten sweets right up to the teetering edge of nausea. My tired iPod’s battery has given in. The women in the seat behind is telling a tale of suburbia that is lacking enough sordid details to be of much interest.