The fearsome four year old is outside the bathroom door: ‘Mummy! Mummy! Mummy!’ Me: ‘Darling, I’m in the shower.’ Him: ‘Mummy! Mummy!’ Me: ‘It’ll have to wait sweetheart. I’m washing my hair.’ Him: ‘Mummy!’ Me: ‘Don’t come in. The students are around. I don’t want them to see me.’ Pause. Scarily long silence. There’s no [...]
Poor old Mike Wazowski. The luckless, depth-perception challenged monster had a hard time of it back in 2002 when Monsters Inc. first hit our screens. Now 11 years later, and at the dawn of the release of Monsters University, featuring the beloved Mike, he finds himself in yet more trouble. I am not talking about [...]
Hi, Cleggers here. Or ‘Cleggety Clops‘ as I’m known in certain sections of The House of Lords. So then, nuclear powers – who wants one? I had a meeting with a nuclear engineer man the other day, and he was a very interesting chap. He was telling me all about radioactivity and why you need [...]
2004 was a significant year for me on many levels. I was about to finish university and was staring long-term graduate unemployment in the face and I managed to avoid watching every single sporting event during the Athens Olympics. Tony Blair opened the United Kingdom’s borders to the 10 new European Union members, including Poland. [...]
Z is for Zinfandel – mummy’s special medicine. Comes in really big bottles. Bish bash bosh. And there, look, you’ve done it, you’ve learnt the alphabet. TA-DA! You took that sucker OUT! Extra bonus mega points for singing the alphabet – “… N O P Q R S T …. rex? U V….” It’ll make [...]
Sod selling the poor parents these magical baby sleep books, regimenting the fruit of their loins and teaching them to sleep, we’re so fucking tired we can’t even spell our own names, but read a book? READ A BOOK? That would involve me moving and turning on the bedside lamp which will wake the little [...]
After returning downstairs from THE QUICKEST WEE IN HISTORY, I PROMISE YOU, I heard Bean in the kitchen, “Ooh, thanks mum for my new ice cream!” Ice cream? What fucking ice cream? I brace myself and walk into the kitchen, expecting to find my three-year old’s face in a container of Baileys ice cream, to [...]
Despite my fond imaginings all those years ago as I sat in my tiny London flat with the roar of traffic passing outside my pollution stained window, it’s not all peace and tranquillity in the country. Even though we bought a house that was down a rural track and bang in the middle of green [...]
Taking photos of toddlers can be really tricky so I knew Ezra’s ambivalence towards having his photo taken couldn’t last. His newest trick is to steal the lens cap from my back pocket and as I’m photographing him try and put the it back on the camera – cheeky sod, good thing he’s cute Like [...]
Mythical Traditions Where did the tooth fairy originate? As parents many of you, like me, will feed your children all sorts of tales over the years about the alleged tooth fairy. Like this?Read more… Recommended by Coombe Mill: Tails from the Farmers Wife
I’ve been struggling with writing. This is nothing new, I always struggle with writing. The main reason is that it’s hard work and I’m lazy. So, in an attempt to kick start a writing habit, I’ve decided to attempt a ’365′. Like this?Read more… Recommended by Sandi Smith
Normal service is resumed. The sensation of squiffiness from the general anaesthetic has ceased. My mojo has returned. But this is what happens to your backside when you’re laid up pre and post a knee operation, when you’re rendered sat on it, feeling obliged to finish off the vat loads of wine and piles of [...]
Do you ever wish you were funny? Now I do have a laugh when I look in the mirror (well it’s better than shedding a tear at the onslaught of my wrinkles!) but no I mean funny like witty…….. Like this?Read more… Recommended by Bloggomy
These are not so much games to play with your kids as activities of necessity, brought on by an over active child, and an over active imagination. Distraction is a technique every parent knows, so it was a chance encounter with the spice rack that stirred my creative juices for my first game. That coupled [...]
I must be the only middle aged women who could buy a dress, wear it to an important function, and only realise afterwards that it has actual w*llies on it. Seriously. And I bought it in a proper grown up lady boutique. I suppose I should have wondered why the sale price was so low… [...]
donkey Like this?Read more… Recommended by HPMcQ
Today was one of those days when I probably should of either stayed in bed or at the very best stayed indoors. I began the morning yelling at the kids and then feeling guilty, emotional and dreadful as they left for school…..Bad Bad Mummy.com. Like this?Read more… Recommended by The 40 Year Old Domestic Goddess
Today was one of those days when I probably should of either stayed in bed or at the very best stayed indoors. I began the morning yelling at the kids and then feeling guilty, emotional and dreadful as they left for school…..Bad Bad Mummy.com. Like this?Read more… Recommended by The 40 Year Old Domestic Goddess
Today was one of those days when I probably should of either stayed in bed or at the very best stayed indoors. I began the morning yelling at the kids and then feeling guilty, emotional and dreadful as they left for school…..Bad Bad Mummy.com. Like this?Read more… Recommended by The 40 Year Old Domestic Goddess
Sometimes. The kids say things that make you laugh forever. It really is true that kids say the funniest things…. Most of the time its Stuntboy what does it….and this week has excelled himself. I love my weekends because it means I get time to cuddle my children in bed without having to get up, [...]
